letter to a friend

dear friend, 

first and foremost, thank you for being there when you were. our weekly get-togethers were a highlight to my week and never failed to make me smile. for years you never failed to offer a helping hand, an extra bed, or simply company. it seems, though, that those years have come to an end. 

dear friend, 

you weren't mine to begin with, but you insisted you were mine in the end. we shared birthdays and hard times, holidays and tears. but i suppose we were never truly each others'. you were not who i called first, and i was not who you called in most situations. in any case, i truly appreciated you and all you did for me and those i love. it seems, though, that your appreciation for me has come to an end. 

dear friend, 

hard times have come upon us again. the past month or two have given us both the opportunity to rethink where we stand both in life and in our friendship. old friends come first. this is something i support with my entire heart. my oldest friends will always be my first priority, so i completely understand where this month has led us. we've been friends for years. it seems, though, that the oldest friend inevitably wins your friendship. 

dear friend, 

i am hurt. i remember hearing that we'd be friends 'no matter what', and that even if our common bond were to dissolve, i would still be able to come to you for friendly companionship. recently, the final hard time we'll share came upon us. shortly after, those promises were broken. you said we could be friends even after something like this. it seems, though, that you didn't know the strength of your other social ties. 

dear friend, 

for future reference, when you say you will be there, be there. when you say you are a friend, be a friend. when you say you will not stop, do not stop. when you say you love someone, love them. i am positive that not all of your friendships have taken this turn, but i am determined to give you the option to keep the rest of them from running this course. if you cannot keep your promises, i suggest not making them. it seems, though, that this advice comes too late. 

dear friend, 

you have crossed a line. you have made me feel alienated in my own relationships. you have made people apologize for being my friend. you have made my grieving process 10x more intense, and 10x more painful, all in one fell swoop. you have disregarded the rules of friendship, stepped in where you should never have stepped in, and crossed every line that has been drawn in any sand. you have been the opposite of a friend since my world has begun crashing down. it seems, though, that you have better things on which to focus your energy.

dear friend, 

you cannot be a friend if you prefer to play matchmaker than help me stop crying. it is blatantly obvious that you would rather participate in the former. 

farewell. 

L