leaving

At what point does leaving become giving up?
Maybe I'm asking because one of the most important people in my life moved across the country this morning. Maybe I'm asking because one of the most important loves of my life will not be moving across the state until next year.
But really I'm asking because one of the shelves in my closet quit on me yesterday, rendering most of my closet useless until it is repaired. My closet gave up. The shelf was about 5 feet up on the wall. Under it hung all my dresses and coats, and above it rested many rubbermaid boxes full of computer cables, photos, games, videos, blankets, towels, and more boxes. The shelf came down, and everything else fell in along with it. Now I give up.
Since I have to clean out my closet piece by piece anyway, maybe I should just pack and move. Leaving sounds like a really logical option. I have nothing to stay for, so maybe I go.
Even my closet can't handle my life right now.
L

ordinary

Not settling for less than "extraordinary" is a lot more work than I remember it being. 

At 19, everything was extraordinary. Every guy who looked my way was a step in the right direction. Every boy I fell for was spectacularly better than the last. I had a way of looking at each new love as though it were the most amazing thing that could ever happen to a girl like me. 

I lost it. 

Nothing is extraordinary anymore. Ordinary is all I can muster up. The only extraordinary moments are a select few with C- not all the time, anymore. But the point of this is not to dissect some moments with C. I'm introducing the next character in this soap opera drama: V.

V likes me. I like V more than I've liked anyone recently. We've been on 3 dates. I haven't once had to ignore a call or text from him. I don't feel like running away. I don't feel like running in, either. We are nothing extraordinary. We get along well in public and one-on-one. He is a good guy, I don't feel like I'm in danger of heartbreak. I'm not terribly worried that I'll hurt him, either. But thats not to say that I'm in this with all of me. I just think he seems rational enough to bounce back when I start ignoring his calls. 

Once again, I'm missing the spark. 

Is it settling if I wait this one out to see where it goes, even though the spark is obviously absent? Or can we just call that good sense? I think I've answered it for myself. 

It's not extraordinary. It might be a bit better than ordinary, but I've had extraordinary, and this doesn't begin to compare. I'll give it a few more shots... but then back to the war path. 

Hopefully he understands.

L